Fore! A Love Story

This August 6th will mark 42 years since my wife and I exchanged "I do's". Since then, it has become a lifetime of far too many she does and I don't's. My ineptitude at most of life's most mundane tasks, from changing a light bulb to lighting a stove, have left my beleaguered partner overworked and often exhausted.

She manages her life and mine with a fierce determination, a steely resolve and, I am certain, more than a few private moments of wonder how she ever signed onto this undertaking.  

But here she still is, sleeping beside me as I write to tell you of my favorite day of each year of our marriage. Our anniversary. Not for the exchange of gifts (for that is not our style), not for the special meals, elaborate plans or big parties. None of that marks these annual reminders of that day so long ago. What makes this day so glorious is that it is the single time each year we play a round of golf together.

I have been struggling to conquer this game for over six decades. And while I wonder why I still think tomorrow the seas will part and I will walk on water, I am drawn as always to the course.

My wife likes to say golf was a product of our marriage. When we first wed, we worked in positions that afforded us the opportunity to sneak out late afternoons to play a few holes. I would put a few clubs for each of us in one bag and we would spend the twilight hours together, alone, our most pressing concern whether the putt was straight or broke a little to the left.

Over the succeeding decades, my wife's interest in the game waned and it was left to me to chase after that little ball into places unknown. Yet once a year she humors me and grants me a few hours with her on the course.

Here, at just the right moment and in just the right light, I can clearly see that little girl I married over four decades past.  She is a natural athlete and though many of her shots end up in undesired locales, there are more than a few that go directly as intended. And when she says "Did you see that" or when she literally jumps in the air with glee after a particularly memorable swing, all the wear and tear of these past decades seems to disappear. She is, in that frozen capsule of time, the young woman who said "I do" with a lifetime of expectations in her pocket, a twinkle in her eye and joy in her heart. Vibrant and unburdened.

Far too soon, the moment passes, the round has finished and the realities of the day return. But while many renew their vows in an elaborate ceremony, my wife and I exchange our promises of commitment by my lining up a putt for her and exchanging wide smiles when the ball immediately thereafter rests in the bottom of the cup. 

The perfect anniversary. On endless repeat.